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This weeks featured jokes:
Aardvark jokes
What did the impatient waiter
ask the gluttonous aardvark?
Is that your final ant, sir!
What do you call a boxing match between two aardvarks?
A snout bout!
"What do you call a pickled aardvark?
A jarredvark!"
"What do you call a Polish aardvark?
A Polaark!"
What do you call a thick-skinned aardvark?
A hardvark!
"What do you call a three-footed aardvark?
A yardvark!"
What do you call an aardvark astronaut?
A starredvark!
"What do you call an aardvark good with a light saber?
A darthvark!"
Animal jokes
First snake: I hope I'm not
poisonous. Second snake: Why? First snake: Because I bit my lip!
There were two cows in a paddock, enjoying the sun and eating some grass.
The first cow said "Moo. "And the second cow said "That's funny, I was just
about to say that. "
Two goldfish are in a tank when one turns to the other and says "Do you know
how to drive this thing?"
What do you call a woodpecker
without a beak? A headbanger.
What's green and has
wheels? A Frog I lied about the wheels
Bird jokes
What do confused owls say?
Too-whit-to-why?
What do owls sing when it is raining ? 'Too wet to woo' !
What do Scottish owls sing? Owld Lang Syne.
What do you call a bird that lives underground ? A mynah bird !
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road without looking both ways?
Dead.
What do you call a rooster who wakes you up at the same time every morning ?
An alarm cluck !
What do you call a very rude bird ? A mockingbird !
Blonde jokes
Did you hear about the
blonde who after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didn't get
taller girls?
Did you hear about the blonde who brought her cosmetics with her for a
make-up exam?
Did you hear about the blonde who got into the taxi, and the driver kept the
"Vacant" sign up?
Did you hear about the blonde who missed the 44 bus? She took the 22 twice
instead.
Did you hear about the blonde who put "Sagittarius" at the bottom of
application forms where it said "Sign Here".
Did you hear about the blonde who stayed up all night to see where the sun
went? It finally dawned on her!
Did you hear about the blonde who thought nitrates was cheaper than day
rates?
Did you hear about the blonde who took an hour to cook Minute Rice?
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